Still Missing My Baby

It's been several months since Betty's passing. The days are becoming more bearable. I'm able to push her to the back of my mind. I fear I will forget her. I miss her so much. I suppose it's true, you never know what you have until it's gone. She comes to me in my dreams. Each night she returns just as she is but my dreams never last long enough. I just want to sleep forever and dream. It's the only way I get to be with her. The guilt will never disappear. I failed her miserably. How can I let something I love so much die? I replay it a million times in my head how I could changed that awful day. Has anyone invited a time machine? I'm looking for one, to go back to that awful day and redo everything I did wrong.